For her the picture extends to a theatre-sized reception venue overflowing with more friends, relatives and well-wishers watch her with love, pride, envy, jealousy and more emotion one could phantom, as she salsas her way to the high table she passes an imposing, well decorated 5-tier wedding cake.
In all honesty it is truly a great and memorable day for all concerned. It is a day for joy, laughter and celebration. The groom’s parents are happy their son has been elevated to higher responsibility. The bride’s parents breathe a sigh of relief.
For the gossipmongers the reception leaves enough to ooh and aah about. The sheer beauty of the cake, decorations on the walls, the foreign stitched gown, the exquisite ring
I am fortunate to have attended a number of wedding receptions and though I hear more complimentary and positive remarks, I have in more than a few occasions heard some not so good and near unprintable utterances by people I want to believe were gatecrashers. Imagine a young man seating a row in front of me, who seconds after being served a plate of rice in a wedding reception recently in Lagos, lamented to his friend beside him “oh boy, the rice them give me small o! E be like the people wey dey wed na Ijebu!” (Refereeing to the possibility the celebrants were stingy)
In full support his friend having collected a similar helping couldn’t agree more “the meat self be like maggi cube and the moi-moi no don well” (obviously not impressed with the size of his piece of meat)
Though they were right about the quality and quantity of the food, I felt they were not being fair to our host. I was contemplating airing my view when one blurted “Check out Bros (the groom), he is not dancing at all. It looks like he is not happy!”
Once again they were right, the groom was not dancing and he sure was not looking too pleased. Even though most Nigerian men are not prone to dancing in church, it calls for concern when a groom follows suit on his wedding day.
I dare not blame the groom, who happens to be a friend, for not being his boisterous self. Knowing how tough life has been to him and what he earns you would begin to understand why he could ill afford such an enormous wedding reception he has been cajoled to shoulder.
A lot of Nigerian youths dread the thought of getting married and this has little to do with the psychological fear of shouldering greater responsibilities. Contemplating a society wedding in present day Nigeria is one nightmare too many. The cost of the venue, the cake, food and drinks, etc is immense and a young man trying to break through the shackles of poverty simply cannot afford it, but because he wants to impress his bride and in-laws, he invests his life savings and possibly borrowed money on a few hours of conviviality
The bride on her own part may want to understand with her heartthrob, but Haba, she is not the only one struggling to make ends meet, and besides society wedding is the order of the day.
Since Nigerians have decided to wallow in hypocrisy, waiting for a messiah to bell the cat, I think the government should put a check to extravagant ceremonies. People should be allowed to spend to a particular limit relative to their income. Certain halls and venues should be prohibited from being used for such ceremonies and the people on their part should frown at extravagant ceremonies, especially when the celebrants are not well off. And the bride price? Do we have to pay at all? After all it’s a risk both parties have decided to take.
The advantages of this are gigantic with rippling effects penetrating fibres of our society. Couples could finally get married on time. Age gap between parents and children would be reduced, and the parents would be young and strong enough to guide children through life. Poverty rate would be reduced and new couples would have enough to plan their life with. The benefits are endless.
Wishing my thought materializes so I can finally propose, after all am not getting any younger!
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