by Grace
Published on: Nov 15, 2007
Topic:
Type: Opinions

When Ben’s sister called me two months ago to inform me that Ben was in hospital and in critical condition, it did not occur to me that he would end up in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). I met Ben during a friend’s wedding and we exchanged contacts. Since then, we became very good buddies. Besides my fiancé, he is one friend who has stood by me, seeing the best and worst of me and helping me realize my dreams regardless of my positive status.

I arrived in the hospital and for the first time in my lifetime headed to the ICU, a place I had heard about but had never been before. And there was Ben, lifeless, with pipes and machines everywhere. I looked at him and fear gripped me, fear for the unknown.

There were so many things we had planned to do and many places to visit especially during this coming Christmas Season. “God, can you hear me? Please answer just this one prayer: give me back Ben.” This became a silent prayer, always on my lips. For two long weeks, Ben was just there, motionless. Then the doctors informed us that he was not responding to medication, and I lost hope of ever seeing him alive. I prayed and fast, and surely God answers prayers!

Two weeks later, Ben started responding to medication, and God is great because his recovery was quick and four days later he was talking and feeding. It was great to have him 'back'.

It was during our chat when Ben informed me that before hospitalization, he had requested for a HIV test and the doctors were yet to inform him the results. Knowing what this entailed, I expected the doctor(s) to counsel him before giving the results. I was shocked the next day when I went to hospital only to find Ben pretty sick and in shock. In pain, he told me, "They just told me my results which showed that I am positive." No counseling was offered to him before and after the results were given. He has since then become withdrawn and angry. I have no apologies to make to the said doctors, but one thing they should know is that HIV patients or any other patient for that matter have their rights, which should be respected! I have been asking myself: couldn’t they have waited for him to at least recover? Don’t they have any doctors who are trained in counseling?

As I am writing this, Ben was discharged and is been offered counseling elsewhere. He is doing great! He has become my source of inspiration. Despite what he has gone through, he has the will to live. When I asked him about his forthcoming wedding, he looked at me for a long time and replied, "I can’t wait to wed my beloved Margie!" The lesson learnt here is that whether you are HIV positive or not, it is never the end of the world! You can still make life out of it.

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