http://Maxellnimons.tigblog.org/ What's on the minds of young leaders from around the globe? en-us http://Maxellnimons.tigblog.org/post/3472047 To my own surprise I was not very angry at this. I knew that she’s really worried. I might die in my sleep “anytime”. Period.
It was 4 in the afternoon and I already had problems breathing. My dear rotten brain started commanding: Get outa bed, put some clothes on, go wash your face…
And while doing all this think about how ridiculous your reflection looks back at you. How messy your hair is. How much weight you have lost in 3 weeks. Light some candles. The soft friendly light gives the dark room a warm feeling. But candles are bad for you. They burn oxygen.
Last night I finished reading a story of a young epileptic man. Everyone called him an idiot. Through out the 972 pages of the book he was constantly called an idiot while I couldn’t help agreeing with his thoughts or statements. I’m an idiot too but nobody knows it yet.
Curled up on my bed, I breathe in deeply. I smell him on my pillow, he was here yesterday, we made love, the world exploded.
When I’m in his arms I feel like we’re floating in an endless space made for just the two of us. We’re alone, completely alone, no one else exists, that’s my greatest wish.
And when he leaves I think about the future. Our future. We are old, very old. And we have nothing to do other than sit on the porch in warm summer afternoons and think about the old days. When he could lift me off my feet and take my to my bed or when we could swim for hours and not once feel tired.
And we have no regrets. No regrets at all. We grew up together. Grew old together. We watched life from the same view. We watched the world change. Hand in hand, we “lived”. that’s what I see for us. That’s what I dream about.
But that’s just a dream, I wake up and I’m still curled up on my bed. I’m gonna die. Soon . And he will live my dream with someone else. He would be happy. I want him to be happy, I’m happy. Happy.
]]> Fri, 03 Dec 2010 17:12:00 -0500 http://Maxellnimons.tigblog.org/post/3472047 35.6719444 51.424444435.671944451.4244444